Lori Loughlin, Julian Assange, Michael Avenatti share jail cell on 'SNL'

17 Avril, 2019, 12:50 | Auteur: Christine Menetries
  • Kate McKinnon's Lori Loughlin thinks she's the craziest person in prison

"How did you know about that?" All three have been arrested for various crimes in recent weeks.

Kate McKinnon did a killer deadpan take on the former Aunt Becky, swinging by a men's prison (for some reason) to shake things up, impressing/scaring the longtimers, lifers, and new fish with her truly terrifying crimes.

"I'm the craziest dude in here", said "SNL" cast member Kenan Thompson.

"You think prison is hard?" she said.

"Oh really?" McKinnon's Loughlin laughs. "I've done 68 Hallmark movies", she said.

Then Pete Davidson's Avenatti entered, telling his fellow inmates he's committed "crimes you can't even conceive of, like blackmailing a sneaker company and stealing taxes from a coffee shop to fund a race vehicle team".

Davidson's Avenatti, who boasts he may run for president of the United States with Alec Baldwin as his running mate, tells his celebrity cell mates, " I'm so shady that a porn star once said she had distance herself from me".

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Not to be outdone, however, Julian Assange (played by a moonlighting Michael Keaton) pops in to say, "Is he, though?"

Emma Stone hosted the show this week, but it was actor Michael Keaton who, in a surprise appearance, starred in this week's cold open skit.

"I'm the architect of anarchy".

Needless to say, after Assange's monologue, he had convinced everyone in the prison cell that he was the craziest criminal among them. Here's how insane I am. I'm from Australia. I live in London in Ecuador.

He continues, "I attacked th USA military, bitches. I'm the scourge of the cleaning staff at the Ecuadorian embassy", Assange said, threatening to release the inmates' private photos and documents online if they bother him. "You try figuring that one out", Keaton's Assange declares in the sketch. Yeah, you cheat your schools and, you know, you rob your companies.

Assange then pulled aside a fellow inmate, played by Kyle Mooney, and threatened to leak all of his incriminating files, including racy "ding-dong pics" and embarrassing ideas for a Shark Tank pitch. I've attacked the United States military, bitches, 'cause I'm an actual James Bond supervillain. "So you wanna get nuts, so let's get nuts".

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